It seems obligatory that every aspiring candidate for president or prime minister write a pre-campaign book, then do the talk show circuit promoting their book. Inevitably, these books are titled something like "What I Believe" but the content is "I Am So Great!".
I can't imagine a scenario where I'd be so bored that I'd actually pick up and read Justin Trudeau's "Common Ground" or Hillary Clinton's "Hard Choices". Being forced to read the upcoming tomes from Ted Cruz or Mike Huckabee would be cruel and unusual punishment.
Since these books are almost always ghost written anyway, I thought I'd help out those who have not yet committed their oh so important thoughts to paper. Here's the table of contents of the political book I'd actually read:
Chapter 1 - The List of People I'm Currently Sucking Up To
Chapter 2 - The Jobs, Grants & Regulatory Changes I've Promised To the People Listed in Chapter 1
Chapter 3 - The People I Pal Around With That I Actually Can't Stand
Chapter 4 - A Prioritized List of the People I Will Throw Under The Bus The Moment They're No Longer Useful To Me (most of Chapter 3's list, plus others)
Chapter 5 - The List of Campaign Promises I Have No Intention of Keeping
Chapter 6 - The Electorate Are Too Stupid To See Through My Bullshit
Chapter 7 - The People Who Know Too Much About Me, and How I Will Silence Them
Chapter 8 - What I Really Think Of My Predecessors & Opponents
Chapter 9 - The Beliefs & Opinions I Hold But Will Never Say Out Loud
Chapter 10 - How I Pretend To Sympathize With Every Interest Group
Chapter 11 - How I'll Live A Rich & Comfortable Life After I Leave Office
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